Hyperactivity  Impulsivity  Inattention 



Overwhelmed? Thoughts coming from everywhere? Making poor decisions?  Unable to switch off? Can’t take in what people are saying? Always got to be doing something? Can’t sit still? 

Hyperactivity, Impulsivity and inattention are the three defining behaviours of ADD and ADHD.  What may come as a surprise to you though, is that these behaviours can show up in your life both separately, and in a range of different combinations at different times, depending on the situation.

Generally, if you live with ADD and ADHD you can become extremely overwhelmed in certain situations, and so it’s hard to know which behaviour trait dominates, or to have any sort of control over your behaviour, it’s like it takes you over and controls you.

There are more and more studies now that are looking at ADD and ADHD from a different perspective.  What lies behind the hyperactivity, impulsivity and inattention is a dysregulated nervous system due to anxiety which makes life extremely overwhelming.  Instead of being able to slow down and think through a situation calmly, it all becomes too much and sometimes poor decisions are made.

adhdADHD and ADD can feel like:

  • A million thoughts coming at you all at once
  • Intense worry without seeing an end in sight
  • Feeling judged and criticised
  • Unable to focus and concentrate
  • A feeling of indecision and uncertainty
  • Difficulties in relationships
  • Flaring up with anger and frustration
  • Feeling unfulfilled
  • Low self worth

In my experience, whether you take medication or not, ADD and ADHD behaviours respond very well to a therapy which regulates the nervous system.  This means talking about what is worrying you, what is causing anxiety, talking about past regrets and disappointments, traumatic experiences, work, home life and anything else that comes up.  Talking about this with someone who gets what you’re feeling creates a sense of being understood.  Trusting another person in this way is very calming and relieving of tension and anxiety.


Being in relationship with someone who understands you and what’s going on inside can be so calming that sometimes the intensity of behaviours loosens its grip. 

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